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You’ve heard of depression eating, or anxiety eating, or plain old binge eating.  I’ve realized lately that I’ve been climate-related-existential-angst-eating, and it’s a thing.  C.R.E.A.Eating.

The more I am choosing to face our climate reality and just how uncertain it all is, I’ve been witnessing a handful of responses in my general being.  I’m more actively grateful for simple things every single day.  I appreciate that they may be limited, and I’ve wondered if this is exactly what it’s like to have a terminal diagnosis and to know you only have so many days left to live (which of course brings up the irony that this is of course true for every single one of us at all times, it’s just easier to pretend that it isn’t).  I find myself savoring many experiences every day as well; tastes, smells, the laughter of my daughter, and the interests of my son. I’ve come to truly relish the look in my wife’s eye, and sitting near to her or watching her walk by.

But one of the biggest things has been my realization that climate realities could very well lead to the breakdown of basic systems, like delivering food to my local market, and my ability to just grab whatever I want whenever I want it.  Do we really appreciate that in the history of our species this ability to eat whatever whenever for even mildly successful western dwellers is indeed truly a miracle of logistics ~ the food chain is so complex, delivery systems so intricate and interdependent on so many different forms of communications and mechanical transportation, that it seems quite vulnerable to disruption at any given point. 

It’s amazing that I can eat a pizza at the slightest whim, and sobering to realize just how precarious the whole system is. It’s taken me a while to realize why I’ve gained 15 lbs over the past two years, because I’ve been eating like it’s my last meal, savoring flavors and variety and sometimes just plain old comfort calories like there’s no tomorrow. Because maybe there won’t be, or at least maybe there won’t be for the convenience of Trader Joe’s.


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